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My girlfriend said that we should end this because she is confused about her feelings for me. I wished her well and disconnected. Should I call her and ask her if she wants to get back together?
If you are considering reaching out to your ex to discuss the possibility of getting back together, here are some points to consider:
Timing
It is generally advised to give both parties time to heal and reflect on the breakup. Waiting between 3 to 5 months after the breakup can be a good benchmark, especially if the relationship was significant25.
Emotional Readiness
Ensure that you have healed and are no longer acting out of neediness or desperation. Reaching out from a place of confidence and emotional stability is crucial. You should have an abundance mindset, recognizing that there is enough love and happiness available for you, regardless of the outcome with your ex5.
Communication Approach
When you decide to reach out, do so in a respectful and non-aggressive manner. A casual, light message can be a good starting point, such as a "memory text" that brings up a positive shared experience. However, be cautious not to ignore or sweep under the rug any serious issues that led to the breakup5.
Rebuilding Trust and Communication
If your ex is open to talking, focus on rebuilding trust and improving communication. Small, consistent actions can help in rebuilding trust, such as following through on commitments. It's also important to address the issues that led to the breakup in a constructive manner, possibly with the help of a counselor1.
Self-Reflection and Growth
Both you and your ex need to have grown and improved as individuals for the relationship to have a better chance of succeeding if you get back together. Be skeptical and ensure that both parties are committed to making the relationship healthier and better than before5.
Respect Her Decision
If your girlfriend expressed confusion about her feelings, respect her decision and give her space. Reaching out too soon or with the wrong intentions can be counterproductive. Make sure you understand and respect her current emotional state before initiating any contact25.
In summary, before calling your ex, ensure you have healed, are emotionally ready, and approach the situation with respect and a clear understanding of the past issues. If you do decide to reach out, do so in a way that is light, respectful, and open to constructive communication.